Love is something wonderful, so they say. And I've trusted them, until right now.How come I haven't experienced what everyone's talking about? "It comes when it comes," my very-much-in-love-friend said with a smile. "I didn't search for it, it came to me." She flashed another smile. Those two sentences felt like a knife through my chest. So, I'm just supposed to wait? I don't want to wait no more. I've been waiting and searching for almost 20 long years. I want to be able to feel, touch and taste the "love" that is supposed to be out there. Because love, that is what I've answered when people ask what I think life is all about. But now I don't know anymore. Because I can't keep hoping, waiting and praying for it to appear forever. Because then I will die without having to experience life, since the whole meaning with life is just that- love. It hurts for me to realise that love is all around me but somehow I'm not even allowed to have a tiny, small piece.
Should I give up on love, or die trying?
I have been doing this for 19 years, and I think what we both should do is not run after it. The more we try to look for it, the more disillusioned we become because everybody around us has experienced it.
ReplyDeleteBeing the only one of a BIG family who is always the only one without a partner (and I am not the youngest of my siblings) is not nice, and it makes me feel an outcast. I know exactly what you mean. But why waste time thinking it will never happen to us? There should be a tiny fraction in your heart that actually believes better things will happen to you, they will.
all the best! :)
Don't give up, but try to switch your focus on love to loving yourself...it won't work all the time and may not be easy, but it will work some of the time & your payoffs will be more enriched because they are based in reality & your worth your own love. Once that is cultivated you will be more open to finding a lover outside of yourself who can be a partner to match you in way that will fulfill what you've been searching for. Sometimes when you hear about love stories that seem to good to be true, you have to realize they may be. Lots of people build up fantasies about love that cannot be lived up to. If you love yourself wholeheartedly then you truly have something to offer another & you will be better suited to identify who is worthy of you...
ReplyDeleteBest wishes!